Life, glorious life.

07 Dec

Hello people,

Was going to update a few days ago, but unfortunatel my livejournal is stored on the “mad cow” server, which happened to be mad indeed at the time. Well, the server was down anyways, whatever the particular brand of “madness” it might have been.

Today was my Software Engineering placement interview. It seems there are more possibilities for placements in Glasgow than I realised, of which I am rather thankful. It will make things considerably easier if I am able to get a job in Gla. over the summer… accommodation for both the summer and next year will already be virtually sorted, and the greatest worry I may have will be getting transport to my particular placement location, which, though possibly awkward, is not impossible.

So, things might not be as bad as expected on that particular front.

As far as assignments go.. I should be working now, but needed a few moments of reflection. Or, to tell the truth, to record something really sweet, but more of that later.

Currently I am in the last week of “normal” lectures/assignment hand-ins of this term. Then we only have the C crash course in the last week. “Only” being the most inaccurate word in that last sentence. Given that about the sum and total of my current C work has been reading over a piece of C code written by nex over the summer…

Anyways, to get onto the real cause of this particular post…

Today I was actually feeling rather down, to tell the truth. The whole “being obliged to be sociable even when you don’t feel up to it” was getting to me a bit. Well, it was more that I felt under pressure to go to the Freeke’s for tea, when I was too tired to enjoy it/too much stress to properly appreciate it.

They kindof meant it for good though. Pressurising me into coming was, I guess, one way of making sure I came. And I think they’re a bit worried about me sometimes, what with being stressed and all that. I think they think I’m working too hard, or something… how wrong can you be! So, they thought they’d “force” me to take time out from my studies. It just wasn’t consistent with my own planning of work/breaks, which means I either cut out all my breaks (humanly impossible) or cut out some work (which I don’t like doing, and will have to be “carefully managed”)

I feel a bit bad about it too. I hardly see MJ at all anymore, after seeing her every day in class for the past two years. It’s really a consequence of our being in different subjects now, and all that, but I think MJ feels it a bit more than me, ‘cos I’m just so plain stressed all the time that I don’t notice “missing my lunch with her” or whatever. I got used to her not being around over the summer too. She’s used to having me around in maths, and discussing all her maths homework with me. Whereas I’ve never had that with computing… I’ve always been discussing it with people who I’ve only just met on my course.

Then with me being kept so busy all the time, and spending so much time with the same set of computing-people. Not that I mind that so much (it’s all part-and-parcel of this course), just I do miss my other friends a bit, and feel bad when they miss me too. 😦

Jackie made me a cake (and Alison came round to help, I gather, too.) It was really sweet of them to make the effort and all… but that’s what made it so difficult. They tried their bestest, but it was really more time out than I could afford, and therefore means yet another stressful catching-up process. *sob* And I was just beginning to feel I might have half a chance of getting on top of things at some stage… Oh, well, they meant well and thats what really counts I guess.

But, and here’s the nice bit… MJ more than made up for it all by *the* most wonderfully precious present ever! Just as I was leaving she handed me a bag. A blue “FP Bookroom” bag. I said “Oh, thanks MJ!”, trusting it would be something thoughtful, and beneficial, whatever it was. And then she goes, “You can probably guess what it is.” It’s “Dear J” which has just been published!! 😀 I’m happy! And it so hadn’t crossed my mind I’d get it as a b’day prezzie… I love my friends! I love them so much! They proly are more right-er than me about everything… I’m just a silly wee girl after all 😉

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Posted by on Tuesday, December 7, 2004 in selfish



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